Monday, April 26, 2010

"what's wrong with me day"

been having bad days and nights for the past 3 or 4 days... i can't sleep ==! like now.. it's 30 minutes before 6am....
i think if i continue to go this way.. i think i need sleeping pills soon.... or maybe a coffin if something really goes wrong.... choi* touch wood*

yet again... i'm slowly losing my mental strength...
yet again... i'm slowly losing my physical strength...
yet again... i can feel that i'm losing my temper a little bit more easier comparing to the last 4 to 5 years...
i was wondering... is " _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ ___ _ _ ___ __ _ _ __ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ blah blah blah blah blah " a mistake???
cause i felt my life is purely effected...

I'M SLOWLY LOSING MYSELF!@#~~~
dame... i think i'm thinking too much ==! what if what i think is correct??? jia lat lo?

Fire walls..... i hate them so much.. barriers... dame.... why do they exists...

i have to ask everyone.... blah blah blah =( , should i?
this is something i don't want to lose...



Sunday, April 25, 2010

i'm superman.

A rich guy can't buy everything,

a smart person can't know everything,

and a patient man can't tolerate everything.

Everything has a limit....







There's 2 road for you to pick, which will you pick?

- A long, wide, and fast highway


or


- A kampung road, pusing kiri, pusing kanan, masuk lubang kecil, masuk lubang besar, jumpa kerbau, jumpa babi, jumpa ayam, jumpa hantu putih, jumpa hantu merah.




Today, i'm having a hell time ignoring the pain on my head. Ah Siang gave me a headshot using the martell. Ouch!
Tonight, i'm going to input a few knowledge that is required for tomorrow. Thursday Night, i'm going to headshot myself.

1st May... i'm waiting. iron man2... i'm waiting. IP Man2... i'm waiting. _______... i'm still waiting.

till one day i'll be telling you something you don't want to hear from my lips.
guess*




Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Last Update.

Right now, i choose to leave everything alone.
My hopes, my dreams, my wishes thrown into deep sea.

Now i know,
Our friendship only lasted few weeks after we met.
Now i know,
You've been avoiding me after this years.

Now,
You should be happy.
You got you wanted!!!

Thank you,
I learn alot.
Now i learn not to trust.
Now i learn not to believe.
I don't believe there is god.
I don't believe there is fate.

- Pok -

Sunday, February 7, 2010

New year lo...

Just the begining of the year... and i've started to fall (mental phycology)...
seriously, there is just 1 thing bothering me... and that 1 thing made a huge impact in my life...
really can't be explain... not even once upon a time can help me start telling or expressing those feelings....

well... i always been a very stubborn person. They say what is your's will come to you, what is not your's will never be your's!!! but this theory doesn't apply to me. What is not mine, i'll make it mine!! =)

Another thing that is bothering me is, 8899!!! oh dame god mother jesus criss... i can feel that you're failing me... Please don't fail me in those critical moments.. thats all...


College,
WTF man!!! i wonder what the fuck his mother feed him with... why the hell he want to bitch about me??? i don't even know him and he don't even know me!!! if want to bitch, bitch to 1 or 2 people enough la!!! why the fuck want to bitch to the whole class??? never fucking judge me wei!!! em lan song come to me face to face la... like the fuck i scare you and your lala friends...! i'm never scared of lala people!!!... whatever dragon or tiger or whatever lapsap on thier hand.. those are just arts!!!(KINGS OR PREDSIDENTS OR PRIME MINISTERS DOESN'T HAVE THOSE AND YET THEY HAVE LOTS OF POWER!!!!) if jealous of what i have, TOO BAD LA!!! GROW UP LA!!!!! bitching about me won't help...sohai!!!!
wasting my fucking energy!!!


Friends,
haha.. as usual la... those who have the heart will always be there...
Those who tak der heart, alla... who needs you la...

By the way, Special Thanks to Cheri Leong and Jess Lai.... Happy Birthday and that night was a great party... great to see few of SriKLians after such long time...!!!


Anyway, i guess this year won't be a good year for me... it is just the beginning of the year and i have so much to stress about...

Haiz!!! Lots of nightmare everynight!!!


- zipok -

Sunday, January 31, 2010

冲动了。。。

I wish this feeling will go away...
Everyword i said came from the bottom of my heart...
Sorry and please forgive me...

i guess i'm really black hearted...
我是黑心的。。。
i want it all or nothing at all...
我得不到。。。

是我的错。。。是我不好。。。

goodbye 不代表我不爱你。。。

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

我我我我我!!!你们。。。

Yawn...
been having too much bad dreams for the past 2 months... day after day after day, night after night after night...
makes me so tired and sleepy till i have to face the word "eh pok, what happened to you?" or " eh pok, din't sleep yesterday?"
for those who asked... there, here's my answer to your question...


Well, i think the only moment i enjoy was in terengganu where is the place i don't have to think & care so much about... Anyway, Congratz to Wei Khang & Jin Ying... And great to see most of college friends gathering and having fun together...
Terengganu.... kinda.... a... boring... place... accually... =) no offence...
good thing is... relaxing... food... food... food... beer... beer... beer... "ZIPOK!!@#!@ thirsty ==!" wth... scaring moment...


HmmmMMmmm.... i guess what i am doing now is changing the way i'm living again... listening from people about what they say bout me... mostly insults and judging me...
i dislikes people judging me... << ****Judge yourself**** before you judge me... you don't even know what i'm doing and you just judge me... you won't even know if i'm doing black or white things... to make things very clear " You have no rights to judge me ".


College life... monday tuesday wednesday thursday.... morning afternoon morning morning... assignments assignments assignments... ==! i wonder who is the first person created assignments and homework... the only thing i need is to focus and put a heart to studies for now... makes me remember about what happened today.. the lecturer needs a extra english class... she can't even say my name properly... simple and easy - Zi Pok - .. she pronouns it - Ci Pok -... the world is changing...


Clubbing life... i keep telling myself i want to stop... i want a better life... i don't want to have a drunk life... but people around me "hey pok, club!!! lets go..." it is so poisoning that most of the time i can't resist...


Love... do you really know the meaning??? i tell you what i see in the dictionary.."feeling deep affection or passion" they say falling in love is a good thing... but what i encounter is purely negative... for time and time again i asked myself why the hell i to drag myself into this kinda shit? but i guess it is too late... still so damn crazy bout her...


Hate... in another word, dislike! or FUCK YOU!!! i really wonder why he called me up and spam my phone just to tell me HIS bunch of dog shit cat shit bull shit his family shit... tell me so much for what.. i only got a word that describes him... ham ka fu guai or ham ka chan...


Learning... self control... not to say rude words to everyone including close friends and family ==!... doing most of the things by myself... responsibility... punctual... let go those feelings that i don't want to have...


some things can be said but not done...

"when will i ever be loved".
- Zi Pok -

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

woo~?

i really wonder what the hell is happening outside my house ==! around 15 to 20 police standing nearby... haiz.. dota lose lose lose lose lose.. what a bad night to dota... should stay at home sleep and be ready for tomorrow...

haiz haiz haiz... sad la sad la sad la... i wonder will i ever find my happiness back again...
my laptop kena virus again, causing me cannot enter facebook and so on... feeling so dead this few days... can anyone bring me back from this feeling?

really... i'm getting sick of everything in my life...
全世界, 好像只有我疲惫

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

New Year!!!

Kanasai... have to rewrite every shit i written just now... here we go again!

it starts with hey~!

Just another blink of our eyes again... and here we all are!!! the ending of Year 2009...
yes, time past freaking fast you just don't know it... another 2 or 5 blink you'll be seeing yourselve with white hair...

sigh..

some, would like the time to past faster... some, would like to go back time...
me, Zi Pok, would like to go back time to undo the wrong and regrets...
i wish i can time travel... but too bad la... who ask those scientist to be so stupid cannot invent a time travel machine... sigh.. nevermind this shit... it's impossible... skip this topic..

sigh..

Wondering,
Wondering,
Wondering....


What to do for New year Eve???

Club? No way... i'm tired of it...
Genting? X .... i don't want to get stuck in the middle of the mountain and shout 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! that's stupid... rather go to church and sing aleluya...
Pub? nope... trying to skip alcohol...

Just thinking bout a simple steambot with BUNCH of friends at home where we all can sit down, chit chat and bullshit around...
no need to think so much...


sigh.. Enduring is difficult...
sigh.. Fate is made by ourselves, not god...
sigh.. Love is pain...
sigh.. I'm getting my ass out from college in 2010!!!
sigh.. My life is full of praises and insults...
sigh.. I want to fall, but I have friends that doesn't let me fall...
sigh.. I really don't know who the hell i am now...
sigh.. I think i need a doctor ==!

haiz.. sleep sleep sleep... better not think too much...

Anyway,
New Year, New Wishes! Happiness is around you... Open your dame god eyes bigger or wear a god dame specs and look god dame properly... God dame Best wishes to all of you.. Good Luck and Happy New Year... 2010!! here i come.. bitch!!!


- 失落的子博 -

cannot understand my english? =) feel free to ask... i can translate banana

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Future Planning~

[s][c=#400040]-C.Seong- [/c][/s] : F8, P1, P2 says: 15/12/2009

- Pok 博 <\3 - says: ==

[s][c=#400040]-C.Seong- [/c][/s] : F8, P1, P2 says: the demon shall rise

- Pok 博 <\3 - says: apa tu? ohhh

[s][c=#400040]-C.Seong- [/c][/s] : F8, P1, P2 says: worst then 2012

- Pok 博 <\3 - says: the angle will fall 8/12

[s][c=#400040]-C.Seong- [/c][/s] : F8, P1, P2 says: tat time i everyday drink till u drop k

- Pok 博 <\3 - says: == okay good this i want to hear... i'm ready to suicide with you



Lets see who fall faster! winner got to slap the loser on the face...!!! =) can't wait!

Sunday, November 15, 2009

i Got no Feeling~

Okay la,
first of all... Sawadikah to those who visited this site.

secondly,
i'm going write about how lucky i am, past 2 days...

Here we go, Here we go~~~

Saturday 14th of November 2009,
Club~cLub~cLub~ nahpek! think about it also tolan... kan ta de mama ***** la.... at dance floor push mat 7!? fucked up nerd... give 3 steps not enough, still pushing... never let me see that mother fucker again or i'll give 3 bottles on the head!!! it would be a pleasure if want more!!! i'll find all types of bottle chivas martell blacklabel vodka etc...
that was the fucked up moment...

However,
hmm... kinda shock to see LiAnn.. hahaha... change alot.. not the LiAnn i use to see in SriKL ==! but is nice to meet up again after YEARS of missing somewhere over the rainbow...

After cLub,
Weihow,Jura,Aherr,Ahpek and me went to asia cafe makan ikan bakar, ayam bakar, and limteh limteh la~~~ then went back home... HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHHAHAAHHAHA... Open gate - drive in - close gate - take Mcd(rubbish) out from car - open Door - close door - walk towards rubbish bin - throw Mcd - throw car key - bath - sleep - wake up - looking for key - till night... i'm so clever~

then then then,, not long ago, futsol... my god... 6 chances!!! 0 goal!!! wtf!!! makes Ahpek and WaiLoong shout ARGH!@!#!@#!! till i have to look down on the floor and not look at them... then went Prawning after futsol... 2 hours 4 prawns... david laughed... *again* wtf ==!

nevermind, the least i enjoy =)

and lastly, wishing all of you good night and sweet dreams... till now 3am.. it is time to go to bed and rest well for new begining, new day and new challenge!!!
show me the money money money money~~~ where is the love~~~

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The Mayonnaise Jar


When things in your life seem, almost too much to handle,
When 24 Hours in a day is not enough,
Remember the mayonnaise jar and 2 cups of coffee.
A professor stood before his philosophy class
And had some items in front of him.
When the class began, wordlessly, He picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls.
He then asked the students, if the jar was full.
They agreed that it was.
The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar.
He shook the jar lightly.
The pebbles rolled into the open Areas between the golf balls.
He then asked the students again if the jar was full.
They agreed it was.
The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar.
Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He asked once more if the jar was full.
The students responded with a unanimous 'yes.'
The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand.
The students laughed.
'Now,' said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
'I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The golf balls are the important things - family, children, health, Friends, and Favorite passions ˆ
Things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, Your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, house, and car.
The sand is everything else
--The small stuff. 'If you put the sand into the jar first,'
He continued, 'there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life.
If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff,
You will never have room for the things that are important to you.
So... Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play With your children.
Take time to get medical checkups.
Take your partner out to dinner.
There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
'Take care of the golf balls first
-- The things that really matter.
Set your priorities.
The rest is just sand.
' One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.
The professor smiled. 'I'm glad you asked'.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem,
there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend.'

Monday, November 9, 2009

Monday monday...









wow wow wow...
someone is back to pahang liao... and i'm sure i'm not going to miss him!







anyway.. before this fella went back to pahang, he brought me to banting to call chicken with my few friends(Jura,WeiHow,ChinSeong&Me). The chicken was so pretty.. wow... i even snapped a picture... hahahAha... amazed by the cut of the body... Fuu la Mak~~~ don't play play...!!! and some more silky smooth skin... bo bian la.. maybe drink too much coconut beer drunk already see things alot more MAGICAL xD


i even remember how 5 of us raped the chicken... pity the chicken... seriously.. kelien...hmmmm...Weihow was shouting LAI LAI LAI!!! then the rest of us responded " Oh yi chi lai(together) ".....then ! @ # $ % ^ & * habis....


=P


that was a 3 weeks ago...
and then~ here... pictures for you all to see... lazy type liao... enjoy ^^





Jura's Car... HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO~~~~~

Neh~ the PRETTY salty chicken~ Sexy huh~?

To be continue.........................................................

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

HaaHAhaHAhaa...

A "pig" hutang me McFlurry... Loser~ xD but i admit i lose also la... hahahahha my computer too ancient liao... =P

wuu~~ today sit a "pig's" Mercedes benz... disappointed with the smell inside.. macam baru bakar tak tau apa ikan dalam kereta... hahahahhaa....... Lunch that time leh, 2 pigs talking... so soft and secretive.... i felt so left out and SPEECHLESS.... i really don't know what to say lo... talk to them also like chicken and duck communicating only... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ don't know which animal's problem la ~~~~~~~~~~~~ hor??~~ Mindy~~~??? don't know leh ~~~~~~

Hmmmm.... after lunch, sleep... till night ==! wake up check facebook... Kensing post the guy dancing... immediately my blurrness gone and started laughing and crying... then little brother show me another dancing video... the louder i laugh... if chin seong is my neighbour, he'll probably call 999 and 911 liao... hahaha... and end of the night.. futsol... Mc's kar cheng nua... hahhAhaahhaha...

End Of 3th November 2009
i smell a song coming...

You know i can't smile without you~ Can't smile without you~~~

Beginning of 4th November...
haha slowly wait la... who so free write 4th november...

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Low Low Low~

Haizz... battery low~
so tired and sleepy. Stupid weather making people sick.. ishh.. Flu..
HAIZZZZzzzz....happy la the doctors... sure got alot customer...

Okay Okay... skip the non-sense.
here goes...

Hmmm.. last week is kinda happening cause someone celebrated his birthday early.... and i want to wish him happy birthday today again.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANNYSS!!!
his birthday was celebrated at cocobanana(mainbase)... hell yea there's alot of people... 6+2 bottles, 7 finish only 1 remain... (i'm so evil i don't even bother to remember their name ==!).
sorry, if you see this and you're the 1 i cannot remember...

that's all for today... my brain ain't working already due to some nightmare & shocking message during 5.13am.... felt like hell...
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.... sleepy head

Monday, October 19, 2009

my lucky week~

Okay~ okay~ okay~
well~ well~ well~
firstly, this month kinda bad luck... day after day the virus attack... trying to build a resistance to it but sometime it fails... occur a pok falling as sick as a dog, can't even move and only sleeping on the bed for 3 days 2 night (a trip to dreamland i suppose)... For that 3 days 2 night, 我的爸爸妈妈认不出我。。。 pity pity pity... and the best part was there is a Special made VIDEO for me posted in the facebook...
Aijaa~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ i don't want to mention name la... but i need to THANK Lucas for holding the camera and adding some salt and ketchup into the video la... TERIMA KASIH.. GAM ZA HA MI DAH.. THANK YOU.. 谢谢.. and not to forget those who add salt and ketchup as well~ AI SHE TEH RU ~ what great friends i have~was so touched, makes me want to cry and sing " From the Bottom of MY Broken Heart - Britney spears " -_________-! 妈的。。。
What else?
17th october 2009
Yahoo~ i got a nose "shot"~ Babe you hurt me so bad~~~~~ ==! haiz... no hard feelings... semua mabuk kecuali perempuanS...


*********************************



MY HEART IS SO ITCHY... i want to mod 8899 ==! but so many friend's birthday coming... banyak sakit kepala la, tapi tangan banyak gatal la~ macam mana macam mana macam mana?????? tuhan tuhan tuhan... tolong la membuat satu miracle.. maksud saya adalah membuat hujan duit rm100 perdrop... tapi jangan selfish~kasi hujan lebat sikit~~ nyaHahahAHahaa make sure hujan dekat rumah saya saja.... xD -My message to god-




********************************

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

My fragile heart.

Love,
A simple word. Easy to write, easy to say.
But do you know the meaning?

happiness?sadness?

maybe you're happiness la~ but mine... i don't know what to say...
it is making me miserable and confused.

放气??? i'll never be the pok you know forever.
lost & heartless

My birthday... June 13th


had a great 1... cause "I'LL NEVER DRUNK DURING MY BIRTHDAY" this sentence, still applied to me xD this is the only picture i have at the moment.. lazy to find the rest of it...

Steambot night!

Picture of the month!
Jura & Winson
The day after Winson's Birthday...
someone report to me that he can't sleep due to some noise coming from the side...
end up having breakfast at Mcdonald(Banting)
Haizzzz... i really wonder what i did to deserve all this.
Before this happen rims masuk lubang besar.

i'll never forget how shaky it is...




Wild Channel

30 July 2009,
i've been sick for almost 4 days 3 nights. 痛死了, 发烧了, 发疯了. tortured.
well.. this is life.